Theatre

It might just be theater.

I used to do theater in high school. So many plays. I wrote plays. I directed plays. I acted in plays, and now I nearly never think about it. I wore a wig and white make-up in Amadeus. I played Mary in The Crucible, which had one line. I wrote a short play called "Sunday Afternoon" and slipped out the back of the theater during the performance, my seventeen-year-old self.

Maybe I like a real life that's artistic but outside. Not performed but merely enacted, pushed forth like someone giving birth to each new thing,

odd word sounds coming out of my mouth as I form them.

For the record: I created a cozy and dark home inside that theater. I needed it.

But of all the things I have pursued in my life,

actor is not on the list.

Landscapes

Not all landscapes are interesting.

Sunsets only happen once per day.

The rest of it is existence. A lot of it is just a body occupying an uninteresting space, in an uninteresting moment.

I am relieved by this.

We are human beings and we already exist. That's a lot better than the alternative.

Lost and found

You can let go.

You aren't who you hoped.

None of us are.

You can remember that like all of us, we stand on an existential miracle and also grace.

You can receive yourself in the same way your recently lost and found kitten waits by the door.

The ultimate hospitality is our own.